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Table of Contents
Overview
Checkout the complete overview of the book The Emotionally Absent Mother: A Guide to Self-Healing and Getting the Love You Missed PDF:
Was your mother preoccupied, distant, or even demeaning? Have you struggled with relationships—or with your own self-worth? Often, the grown children of emotionally absent mothers can’t quite put a finger on what’s missing from their lives. The children of abusive mothers, by contrast, may recognize the abuse—but overlook its lasting, harmful effects.
Features of The Emotionally Absent Mother: A Guide to Self-Healing and Getting the Love You Missed PDF
Here’s a quick overview of the essential features of this book:
Psychotherapist Jasmin Lee Cori has helped thousands of men and women heal the hidden wounds left by every kind of undermothering. In this second edition of her pioneering book, with compassion for mother and child alike, she explains:
- Possible reasons your mother was distracted or hurtful—and what she was unable to give
- The lasting impact of childhood emotional neglect and abuse
- How to find the child inside you and fill the “mother gap” through reflections and exercises
- How to secure a happier future for yourself (and perhaps for your children).
Table of Contents
Below is the full table of contents offered inside The Emotionally Absent Mother: A Guide to Self-Healing and Getting the Love You Missed PDF:
Introduction
Chapter 1. – Mothering
Mother as the tree of life
Mommy is what we are made of
Who can mother?
The good-enough mother
Good Mother messages
What happens when Good Mother messages are absent?
What does it mean to be undermothered?
Chapter 2. – The Many Faces of the Good Mother
Mother as Source
Mother as Place of Attachment
Mother as First Responder
Mother as Modulator
Mother as Nurturer
Mother as Mirror
Mother as Cheerleader
Mother as Mentor
Mother as Protector
Mother as Home Base
Chapter 3. – Attachment: Our First Foundation
How do we become attached, and what is secure attachment?
Why is attachment so important?
How can I know if I was securely attached to my mother?
What if I wasn’t securely attached? How would that look?
What is attachment-related trauma?
Maybe I wasn’t securely attached to my mother, but is it really fair to hold
Can I still develop secure attachments if I’ve only partially done so in the …
Identifying attachment figures
What is my attachment style?
Can I have more than one style?
Does my relationship with my mother really affect later relationships?
How difficult is it to change attachment patterns?
Chapter 4. – More Building Blocks
Feeling safe and secure
A happy home
When things go wrong, they can be fixed!
A sense of belonging
The budding self
A place to grow
Support for being a child
Touch
Love is the medium, love is the message
Chapter 5. – Mommy, Where Were You?
The hole where Mother was supposed to be
The need for Mother’s physical presence
What happens when Mother is not emotionally present?
Mutual standoff
Thirty possible reasons Mother wasn’t there
How a child interprets Mommy’s absence
When Mother is the only one there
Original Loss
Chapter 6. – Voices of the Under mothered
Who was that masked woman?
Slim pickin’s from Mom
Lack of mentoring
Missed connections
The mechanical mom
Is anyone watching? Does anyone care?
Clueless
No place to go for help
Feeling like a motherless child
No mother, no self
No anchor
Common challenges of the undermothered What helps
Chapter 7. – Healing Mother Wounds
The cover-up
Discovering the wound
Reframing “defects” as deficits
Working through your feelings
Journaling
The healing power of anger
Leaving the past
Chapter 8. – Psychotherapy: Mother Issues and Mothering Needs
Parallels with the Good Mother
Special considerations in attachment-oriented work
Touch in therapy
Re-mothering
From isolation to secure attachment
Therapist as “Teaching Mommy”
Chapter 9. – Connecting with Good Mother Energy
Opening to the Good Mother
Archetypes
Working with imagery and symbols
Help from the Divine Mother
Taking on the “good” of the Good Mother
A second chance at finding a Good Mother
Meeting mothering needs with partners
Your portable Good Mother
Chapter 10. – Inner Child Work
An introduction to inner child work
The child as mother to the self
“Parts work”
Becoming your own best mother
Creating a safe place for the child
Time together
Working with Good Mother messages
Healing the unloved child
Changing your mind
Chapter 11. – More Healing Steps and Practical Strategies
Identifying specific “holes”
Taking a proactive approach
The hole of support
Getting support now
A sense of confidence
Navigating the world of emotions
A place in the web
Showing up and being seen
Embracing your needs
Practicing good self-care
Cultivating a capacity for intimacy
Protecting what is precious
Finding your power
Stepping out of deprivation consciousness
General tonics
Chapter 12. – Changing the Story
Your mother’s story
Your story
The dance between you
How do I not pass this along to my children?
What about Mother?
Holding your process/holding your self
Does healing ever end?
Index
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